Photography..YET AGAIN

Ok, so I entered my pictures into the BBC's Photographer of the Year contest (yes, I am that good at taking photographs). There are, I think, 6 categories in total, the first one being "blue", I have sent in my photos for that already (photos which remained top secret for most of the weekend hehehe) and now I have to set about taking photos for the second theme which is...HIDDEN.

This is where you loyal/mad/crazy readers of this blog need to help me out. How can I portray hidden in a photo? I already have one idea but I have to gather the pieces for it. If you have any ideas, do let one know.

Thankies.

Supermarket Theft

Went shopping today and half the stuff I put in the trolley did not make it home.

I am quite upset as I have wanted a specific shampoo for ages and twas too expensive to buy on normal pricing and it was on offer so I got two of them :(

Came home and realised that it didn't make it home with me so I shall have to go to Sainsbury's tomorrow and get some more, I also need to get me some cheese too.

They better have it or else!

I have finally decided on the cupboards that I want for my room, they are pristine white, they shall be ordered tomorrow.

Plus, the La Senza sale is on and I simply MUST go there, will probably go on Tuesday.

Girls

Are funny creatures.

Although I am one of them, I don't really behave like a girl (well, a typical desi girl, hehehe).

I don't know if this is true of white, black, yellow, orange, purple and pink girls but tis definately true of the brown girls I have had the misfortune to know in the past. The white folk I know find it hard to understand how strange desi girls really are and that I only have one brown friend who is a girl.

Anyway, back to the matter at a hand, looking at it from a young G's perspective, desi girls are strange when it comes to guys.

Most of the time they cuss guys about how they try coming over to them and chatting them up and thus are very "Miss Independent" citing that they do not need guys to have a life, yet the SECOND a guy with money (aka his Dad's car) and "class" (he wears Rockport so he MUST have class as dem garmz ain't cheap) pays them attention, they are all over him like a rash and their territory has been marked (well, only if the guy likes being pissed on). From that time onwards, guys are the best thing since sliced bread, they can do no wrong, funny how fast these girls forget their modern day suffragette-isms, simply because they are getting some.

Then comes the time when the guy is pissed off with the constant phoning to see what he is doing, the constant need to ring and find out how he is every 5 minutes and the constant need to see him to make sure he isn't trying it on with another bird (because trust is only one way in a desi relationship you see, the guy MUST trust the girl, yet the girl can be as suspicious of the guy as she sees fit).

So the guy wants to break it off because she is too possessive (never! Where the hell did he get an idea like that from?!), the girl becomes either stone faced or totally loses all self respect for herself and begs him to stay with her, which he won't do because he is getting bare gash at nex manz yard, init geez. Anywho, guy ends it, girl is upset.

Girl is in depression for days and days as she thinks this was the real thing, when in reality she is more angry at the fact that he won't be spending his money on her and she won't be getting any either.

Guy however, is out fucking other women, girl sits at home and starts getting angry at what has happened to her.

Girl remembers that she is Miss Independent and once again goes on her suffragette missions and tells the world that she doesnae need a guy to validate her existence.

Then some fly boy passes her driving his dad's car, blasting some sik chooons from his standard stereo and we are back to stage one as described above.

What I don't understand is, if you are going to paint yourself as a man hater, then stick to that, every time I have gotten out of a bad relationship, the love for men has always been there (but maybe that's because I am easy and have no morals, unlike the girls in the story mentioned above), so I'm not lying to myself like these girls are. Tis funny how in this day and age, a fast car (which isn't even HIS) can get a girl's knickers off quicker than any concoction of words, actions or drinks.

OH MON DIEU!

The Verve have reformed.

Hopefully it mellows out the man Richard again.

This is all.

You know someone has made a fucking wicked album when you are still listening to it more than 10 years after it was made and it loses none of the shine it had the first time you heard it. There is only one album I can say that about..

Stuart McGurk

Hehe...I love this man, though that sentiment may be a bit empty seeing as I have read only one of his articles, but if a girl can say that after reading just ONE, there must be some truth in the sentiment.

Last night I was on the way to the bowling alley and I was reading an article written in the London Paper by a man (Mr McGurk) about Gillian McKeith and I was ecstatic at what he was saying. The majority of men that I know seem to think that the GMK diet is an easy way to lose weight, it is not. I have tried it and I gave up after a week or so, she claims to let you eat an abundance of food and on the TV all the food looks lovely, well I am sure everyone has head the old adage "don't judge a book by it's cover", this surely applies here. I decided to follow her diet for six weeks and after the second week I had enough and was craving salad, of all things, SALAD! That alone must show you how crappy her diet is, everything you are told you can eat is lacking in flavour and colour. That's another thing, on the TV the food looks bright and lovely to eat, the reality is totally different, the food fills you up but tastes like crap, I do believe this is how you lose the weight (no taste-no calories hehehe). Anywho, back to what was written by Mr McGurk (who by the way, I have a good mind to e-mail, if for nothing else but to express my joy that there is at least ONE man out there with some sense).

Now, to the article itself, I read it as I often do, to see what is decent on the TV. I didn't actually see the show and am quite glad I didn't, I don't understand who she thinks she is, she isn't even a doctor (as is mentioned in my favourite paragraph of the article) and why anybody would want to look like her is beyond me. Photoshop is definately her best friend, I have her book and in that she doth look stunning but seeing her in real time, she looks terrible, when the light is on her face you can see how ravaged it is. Everyone knows that eating crap 24/7 is going to kill you, we do not need someone telling us that we are going to die if we keep doing it. Plus, she thinks that by being rude she is becoming the self modelled Simon Cowell of food. She fails to realise that unlike her, Simon actually has stats and money to back up his statements, and (as the article says) "why on earth anyone would want to follow the diet advice from a "nutriotinist" who had to drop her spurious "Dr" title and looks like a shrivelled, freeze-dried chipmunk is anyone's guess". There is no need at all for her to be this rude to people and I am surprised that people are still willing to go on national TV and be ridiculed by a woman who looks like GMK does. If she truly were healthy, why would her face be so warped looking? Do you people not think about that? It is not hard to lose weight yourself without having some "chipmunk" take the piss out of you, and as the article mentioned, she does have a great fondness for shit inspection. I know a lot of people who have lost weight and not once have they needed to have their shit examined. The woman is strange!

Mr McGurk, I commend thee!

Respect

I have a great deal of respect for certain people, there are two people in this world who I respect beyond everyone else, even though we do have our differences. These two people are my parents, it amazes me to see how far they have come from when they got married to where they are now, I am seriously in awe at all they have achieved, both in their private life and their professional achievements. They are the two people who remind me (even though they do not know it) that no matter how hard something is to do, there is always someone who is in a worse position than yourself and also that once you do this problematic "thing" you will realise that there is no limit to what you can do, and that from that point in, the sky is the limit.


Anyway, this isn't about them, this is about another person who I know and also love and respect greatly. I used to respect her beforehand but after what she has done recently, the respect I have for her has skyrocketed, she will never ever know how much I respect her for what she is doing and what a true fucking legend she is. To show the power of mind and body that she has shown in the adversity faced by her is truly amazing and I feel that lesser people would not be able to have done as she has done, I in fact know, that people faced with what she suffered from for 20 odd years would have just taken it like an idiot, but not her! This is why she commands so much respect from me, tis just a shame she will never know the high regards that I hold her in as words cannot express the respect I have for a person like her, what she has achieved in the past few months is a testament to women everywhere who think that they cannot rise up against the crap that they have to face on a daily basis because society will shun them. To those women I say FUCK SOCIETY, make yourself happy and only yourself, when the day of reckoning comes, you will be judged only on how YOU lived your life, not what society thought of you, why waste a lifetime doing what others want, waiting for the day to come when you can please yourself? You know that day will never come, life is truly for the living and live it for yourself and those you love. It doesn't matter if society thinks you're bringing shame on your family, who are they tell you what shame is and what shame is not? They aren't living back in India/Pakistan anymore, you move to a Western country and you integrate into the society. So, make yourself happy, if you are happy in your heart and those you love are happy, that is all that matters, if those around you (for whose opinions you do not care) do not like what you do, FUCK THEM. This is the single greatest problem within Indian/Pakistani families and cultures, you have to at all times think of the "honour" of the family, thus you take the beatings and the crap that your husband's family throw at you because if you DARE rise up and say you aren't going to take it anymore, you are seen as a outsider.

I truly believe in power to the people and that you really DO need to fight for your right to par-tay. Why should you live in fear of being beaten up because the "elders" think it is fine? There is reason that domestic abuse is a crime in this country, I know of instances where a husband has killed his wife whilst his parents sat around letting that happen, I would like to ask these elders one question, would you let your daughter take that kinda beating? NO, I didn't think so, so why is it OK for someone else's daughter to go through the same shit? One other thing I don't get about the old school Asian community at large, they look down on divorcees because they must have done something wrong. The prefer you to be married and getting beats and being unhappy, why is it acceptable for a husband to beat a woman infront of her children, yet it is not OK for the women to live alone and be safe? Those who judge people on face value should take a long hard look at themselves as it is people like them who legitimise women getting beatings, the women become too scared to leave because they are worried what society would say, to these women I say stand up for yourself, do what the superwoman mentioned above has done, break free from it! Society think it is fine to cast judgment on you, let them live ONE DAY in your life and they will soon change their minds.

Being a child/Dreams/Excellent teachers

I have rambled/ranted enough for today so now I think I should write about something more positive.



When I was younger I was a pretty strange child, all of kids at school and down my street were strange by comparison to the sheep children of today, we all had our little quirks, mine was getting cherry stones stuck up my nose and running away from home but returning for lunch and dinner, a boy I went to school with, Ross Armstrong used to slide worms up his nose and then eat them, we'd be carted away by the Social now for having parents who weren't raising us properly. Back then, being a kid was actually fun, you could go out all day unsupervised without the worry of someone abducting you. It strikes me as ironic that the more society opens up to things that used to be seen as dangerous and risque, the more "bad" stuff happens, e.g. society is now a lot more open than it used to be about matters such as sex and yet troubles are increasing, is it worth reverting back to how things were in my childhood? Is the safety of people more valued than the freedom of people? Tis probably the Human Rights Act which made the decision for us. Anyway, being a kid in the late 80's/early 90's was probably one of the best times to be a kid, money was scarce due to many reasons and so you made your own fun. Me and my brother used to stay out in the street until it got dark and there was no fear that someone would kidnap us, the house door used to be wide open and the house was never burgled.


Anyway, times changed and people get older, you start dreaming about what you're going to be when you grow up and then you realise what you really can be.


This is the time that you need to understand that no matter how extravagant your dreams are, HANG ON TO THEM, after all, dreams DO come true, DO NOT EVER EVER EVER EVER BE AFRAID TO DREAM, even if the other children laugh at you (though they seldom do, it is normally the adults who sneer, and tis usually those who have own unfulfilled dreams). When I was 15, I dreamt about studying law and making some decent money and being able to financially aid my mother and father, my whole family laughed at me and that really hurt me as back then we were a secure unit.



Anyway, it was when doing my GCSE's that I met the greatest teacher I have ever had, Mr John Faherty, if there is a Nobel Peace Prize or something for teachers, he should get it. This man is a leg-end and it is thanks solely to him that I am where I am today. It is because of his teaching that I see the world in the way that I do today, it's thanks to him that I am a staunch Marxist (hehehehe) and more importantly it is this man who taught me that you should never ever be afraid to dream, that there is no limit to the human mind other than that put on it by humans, and for this lesson I am truly eternally grateful. If it was not for this man, I would probably be doing something I hated.

Now I am 23 and I have achieved everything I wanted to achieve as a spotty faced 15 year old and then some, and my family still have no respect for me, but they do not realise that I am not a fool, for it is not their respect which I want, I want nothing from them and if all they can do is criticise me and laugh at me, that is their choice for it is that constant non belief in me that pushes me further to prove them wrong, as long as I have the respect of my mother, father and brother I am a happy bunny. The opinions of people for whom I have no respect do not matter to me, for you can call me whatever you wish to call me, I do not recall you being named God and it is only he who is allowed to judge the actions of us mere mortals and take action accordingly so your judgments hold no water with me at all.

Friendship/The Joog

People underestimate how great friends are, everyone goes on about blood being thicker than water but I don't believe that, in my case I hold my friends in MUCH higher regards than I do most of my family. In fact, I sometimes wish that my friends were my family but hey..anwyho, the main topic of today's sermon is one of my bestest (yes, that's a real word) friends in the whole wide world..THE JOOG aka Jagdeep aka Juggy aka Joogi (international man of mystery is he) , the slaphead below is he, though he doesnae look like this in reality, he looks a lot funnier, and by that I don't mean that he has a rubber face, he looks likes a funny kinda guy (which he is).

Wannabe Paris Hilton! There tis a much funnier picture of him pouting but I no longer have that for some strange reason, also, there is a really eeeeeeeeeeeeeevil picture of him as a kid hehehe, a little baby (the hospital kinda pics..WHICH I DO NOT HAVE ONE OF!)

This guy is a leg-end, a bona fide, motherfucking LEG-END.

He is one of the funniest people I know (only 4 people fall into that category), whenever I feel like crap he ALWAYS makes me laugh, he is truly my brother from another mother and the love I have for him is equal to the love I have for my brothers (well duh).

I liken our relationship to that of Spongebob Squarepants and Squidward. Him being Squiddy, me being Bob. We are also very much like my two favourite men in comedy, Richard Richard and Eddie Hitler, The Joog even LOOKS like Eddie. He is eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevil to me but I allow him to get away with it because he is a don. He claims that I look like Dora the Explorer and because I say the word "doi" a lot, he has christened me Doira the Explorer.

He is a bus driver and just yesterday he rear ended someone, hehe.. I will laugh about that forever, I always told him he had a big old arse and now we have proof! I have plans to get on his bus one day and cause havoc and he will be totally powerless, muwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha yeah, I am bad.

I bought him a cake once to say thank you for something and the fat git not only ate the whole cake himself, but he also stole my ice cream AND smeared my top with it (the top has NEVER been the same since). I cut the cake with a key because it was too big and it was at this stage he delivered one of his funniest lines ever (though it only works in that eating-cake-with-a-key situation). Ahh, he also pokes me in shops and makes farting noises so people think I'm letting rip when we all know that girls do not fart, he pokes me for the sake of paining me and he incessantly calls me in bookshops until I turn and pay him some attention, these are just a few of the reasons as to why I love him the way I do, he rocks my fucking socks. He got me interested in the music of Mr Hendrix though he now refuses to give me any more songs, git! The main reason I loves him so is because he bought me Scar Tissue by Antony Kiedis (though I still haven't finished reading it, sorry!)

Anywho Jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooger B Joooger, ye smelleth.

That is all.

So I can't spell

I think I may have to favourite this wesbite, yes wesbite as I am physically unable to spell the word blogger.

Every single time I have attempted to type blogger into Google, I type blooger.

Even now I have had to go back and amend this post several times.

Rock out with your cock out

So I had to return a necklace to Debenhams today and pay some bills.

Being the idiot I am, I decided to wear heels.

And to think I rushed out and missed the top 20 rhcp songs too, wankshaftage.

My feet are now blistered and they are hurting me, dagnabbit!

That won't really stand me in good stead for tomorrow, will it?

Ah, never moind. Sometimes I wish I had an Irish accent, thems is sexy.

Anywho, I had no money and thus found nothing at all to buy, until I went into New Look and found a cardigan and a top I wanted last time (they didn't have my size then) but someone, somwhere must be looking down on me because lo and behold, they had it..it was duly purchased.

Kinda scared/worried about tomorrow but I shall be fine.

That is all.

Btw, I find myself falling in love with Snow Patrol.

Hubba Hubba

If I could marry one "famous" person, it would be he.

If that first photo isn't sex on legs, I don't know what is.

I have earphone sex with him twice a day.